Queen Latifah. Jimmy Fallon. Taxis. How this golden triangle of comedy didn’t come together to produce a watershed comedy of the decade is beyond us. We blame Uber! Everyone blame Uber! Join the guys for a Kyle-less and Alex-less podcast extravaganza, where Nick and Stephen were left to their own devices and had the time of their lives. They talk about everything from French people loving Taxis to the top taxi movies of all time. It’s a roller coaster of a pod, if roller coasters were taxis and Queen Latifah was driving so dangerously that how she didn’t kill someone is a miracle. Giselle is also in it… she’s very bad.
Reel Rotten is Dead, and we are REBORN AS A DARK PHOENIX PODCAST. We’ve entered a new age. A live age. An age where Nick and Stephen PAY their hard earned money and see movies in theaters. This is our first live review, and we stupidly did Dark Phoenix. We cover everything but mostly focus on how horrible Cyclops is. Seriously, he’s just the worst. Also we have an X-MEN draft. No one picked Cyclops, because again, he’s the worst.
After all… you’re my Rollerballlll. This week we watched what can only be described as a movie, Rollerball. Joined by now recurring guest Mike Chouinard, the guys get into the 2002 Rollerball remake. Never seen the first one? It’s OK they didn’t either. This episode they discuss if this movie killed careers (it did), who got sent to jail for this film (they all should have), and if LL Cool J can ever be too much LL Cool J (he can’t). It’s also filled with Stephen losing his patience with Nick, fake sports talk, and at least 15 minutes on the famous night vision scene.
It's a bird. It’s a plane. It’s something that looks pretty similar to Godzilla. That’s right, the guys are taking on the King of Monsters and talking the Matthew Broderick Godzilla. You may know it by it’s alternate title, Jurassic Park: Dumb Version. The guys talk top 5 monsters, how gumballs are the secret to outrunning raptors, and the longest most thorough two minute recap of all time. Also, Nicky and Stevie return!
Nick's MOM is back! Deb returns for the season two finale Mother's Day episode. She explains childbirth, which kid is her favorite and a mother's love. They talk Julia Roberts' wig, top movie moms of all time, and how Stephen will never feel real love. Also support Deb's Diane Keaton podcast!
Note: This podcast was recording in a large room at Nick's mom's house, so we apologize if the quality isn't the same as usual.
Gather you holographic Pokemon cards! It’s time to throw down for Pokemon: The First Movie. Pokemon trainer Jess joins the crew. Together they talk personal top 5 Pokemon, how Team Rocket deserves better, and how Pikachu has to be the strongest Pokemon of all time. Nick does his “best” Professor Oak, and Stephen goes ALL IN on how morally wrong Pokemon training is. Who struck MewTwo first????
This week we watched Avengers. Not Infinity War or Endgame... The Avengers. Where Sean Connery tries to kill people with the weather while wearing a bear costume. In this episode the guys argue with Kyle, shame Kjax and his fact shack and draft Marvel Avengers teams! Also, British people are robots? And Nick does the worst accents of all time. Listen up!
IT’S OUR 50TH EPISODE! To celebrate, we had a HOF Joefest! Returning guest Joe Mancini joins Nick, Stephen, (and Kyle) to get down and Joe Dirty and talk about other Joe movies, Livermore, CA, poop jokes, and Dave Matthews Band.
Bill Murray has worked with some of the greatest actors of all time, like Odie from Garfield, himself from Garfield: Tale of Two Kitties, and a myriad of ghosts in Ghostbusters, but his biggest co-star by far is Tai the elephant in the cinematic “classic” Larger Than Life. In this episode the guys dive deep into the extremely shallow world of movies starring elephants and break down everything from hitch-hiking with an elephant, to feeding and elephant, to why Bill Murray seems to always do these weird movies. They give their top 5 elephant films of all time (there are literally six) and Kyle gives them grief for not loving Dumbo as much as he does. Kyle really loves Dumbo. Listen and subscribe!
Women centric superhero movies are finally starting to get some recognition in the world today, but it’s always important to remember where you came from and thank goodness Captain Marvel didn’t come from Elektra. In honor of Super Women we decided to take a look at a movie that apparently no one wanted to make, and when they did they settled on the most ridiculous decisions. The boys with help of new and not woman guest (sorry) Jackson talk about Elektra, Marvel, Ben Affleck, how Jennifer Garner is much better off now, Capital One, and so so much more. They rank the top 5 female assassins and each pitch their own completely original and entirely terrible MCU characters and feature films. So listen and tell us what you enjoyed so we can only do that from now on!
You Gotti be kidding me! Gotti did not win the Razzie Award for Worst Picture, and we’re protesting by devoting an entire episode to Gotti. Holmes and Watson is funny! Gotti is the least remarkable movie we’ve ever seen, and that’s a bad thing. So we get into what has to have been the nicest movie about the worst person ever. John Travolta and others come together to make what should have been the worst movie of the year, and we will die on this hill shot down by gangsters. The guys with recurring, horrible guest Kyle pitch their own gangster movies and share in moments of silence where we just stare at each other not saying anything in shock about how bad this movie is. YOU GOT IT WRONG RAZZIES!
It’s cold. It’s snowing. It’s a good day for death. That’s the life motto of our good friend and star of Polar, Mads Mikkelsen, who is first of all our good friend and also the star of our first Piss Poor Stream, Polar. Currently on Netflix this movie mostly about blood, death, and sex is one of our best episodes of the year (it’s still early). Brand new guest Mike joins the boys Nick and Stephen and they really get to the bottom of the barrel and scrape out all the leftover body parts still hanging around after the burial. Watch the movie and listen, you’re gonna have a good time, probably, or else.
We finally get to talk about good movies. Nick and Stephen go over their top ten movies of the year, best scenes of the year, and Kyle's top 10. Kyle's top ten is really the most ridiculous part, seriously, listen.
Happy Valentines Day, a day filled with love, money spending, flowers and sex? The sex is what we're here for. BDSM in particular. This may be the first podcast ever that both the men in it were dominated by the woman on the podcast. Nick and Stephen subbing to reoccurring guest and amazing woman Rachael Tiss dig deep into the really fucked psychology of Fifty Shades Freed. We do top 5 sex scenes, and come up with the next Fifty Shades film. Honestly, if you're single, listen to this, and if you're not, listen to this. Let's get kinky.
As the Polar Vortex sweeps through the nation, we here at Reel Rotten remember a simpler time when snow just meant it was time to go shred the gnar with your boys. Which is why we threw it back to the early 2000s and a snowboarding hit that probably shredded right past you, Out Cold. Featuring recurring guest Eric, Nick and Stephen celebrate winter by watching the last best worst snowboarding movie of all time, don’t @ us. The guys do a winter Top 5, play a new genre pitching game, and discuss watching this movie at 13 and watching it again when they’re going on 30. Listen, rate and subscribe. Follow us @reelrotten.
New year, new podcast! 2019 is our year, it is the time when things are going to finally occur for us. Go down if you will. An event will transpire. An incident will take place. This year for Reel Rotten it is Happening! So that’s exactly what we did. Twas an M. Night after New Years and a week before Glass. Not a Shyamalan twist could be trusted especially not the grass. To bring in 2019 Nick and Stephen dove deep into the remarkably short shrub of The Happening. A film that is shocking in many ways, none of them being good. Mark Wahlberg gives the Markiest performance of all time and we couldn’t even pretend to understand all of the different happenings in this movie. Why it happened, how it happened, what the fuck happened… No idea. All we know is that they said the word happen a minimum of 25 times. Featuring no guests except Kyle (anyone but Kyle) we head to the suburbs of Pennsylvania in the worst movie we’ve done so far this year!
Still have that Christmas hangover? Well this episode will probably make it worse because it’s the BIGGEST EPISODE YET! The kitchen studio was filled with egg nog, Christmas cheer, and guests as the guys had on 3 people to discuss the Christmas classic Jingle All the Way. You’ll hear everything from Schwarzenegger singing carols to Schwarzenegger saying all the reindeer’s names to why Phil Hartman was so down casually break up marriages. With the help of Chris, Tyler, and Wil; Nick and Stephen break down Jingle All the Way like it has never broken down before and if this podcast doesn’t cause you to tear up and call your dad to tell him you love him then we’ll send you your money back. Jingle All the Way is available on streaming, so give it a watch and give us a listen. Merry (post) Christmas! God bless Jaime.
Picture something made of your nightmares conglomerated. Now picture that as a snowman. We present to you, Jack Frost. No, we’re not talking about the horror film Jack Frost about a murdering serial killer snowman, this is the much more terrifying Jack Frost… Michael Keaton. For our second Christmas movie we watched a film about a man that dies and comes back to life as a snowman to spend more quality time with his kid. We’re still not sure what qualifies something as “quality time” but there is no way watching this film could qualify as quality time spent. Nick and Stephen drudge through the blizzard that is this movie; with minimal help from Kyle and a new challenge aspect of the podcast the guys get right down to why snowmen are scary, the physics of being made of snow and many more things you should probably listen to and learn if you want to survive this Christmas. Listen and subscribe.
We don’t play no games, and definitely don’t play any Reindeer Games, unless of course Ben Affleck is involved. It’s Christmastime, which means it’s time to get down to business and do Christmas in every way possible. First up is your favorite action Christmas movie (if Die Hard, and frankly many other movies didn’t exist) Reindeer Games! This episode is the first of our Christmas series and is such a bad Christmas movie that they had to reshoot scenes and missed their Christmas release date. This episode features a new format, same voices, and even a brand new original song to the tune of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. The boys discuss just how long it takes for a body to catch on fire, why Charlize Theron decided to do this movie and if Gary Sinise should just do all of his movies without legs. Listen up and wallow with us and make sure to drink plenty of Christmas Spirits before watching this film.
Prepare to be Taken 2 a place unlike any you've ever been. Unless you've seen Taken then it's almost the same plot all over again, but with even more Albanians. Nick and Stephen get deep into the Liam Neeson universe answering all of your questions like why can't his daughter drive yet, and just where is Albania and what are the best Liam Neeson action movies of the last decade. This podcast is basically an audio version of an action movie in Istanbul, loud, badly edited, and full of gun shots and punch noises. So listen and subscribe or continue ignoring us just like our families. Note: This podcast was recorded very late at night, so deliriousness took over the mics at some point.